Writer: Blake
Baumgardner
Reviewer: Thai Xiong
1. The connection that you see with writing
and your future career is brilliant. I’m quite envious of that. By far, your
examples and explanations of how literacy and communication skills will be
implemented is my favorite area of the paper.
2.
a)
Literacy and a person’s history are closely related. To understand an
individual better, you should get to know both their personal and literacy
history.
b.)
The body, while strong, doesn’t connect well with the intro. I believe if you
fix the introduction paragraph to match your essay it will be a lot smoother.
c.)Yes,
the essay does a good job of answering all the prompt questions and fulfills
the requirements.
3. I would say the
majority of the essay that needs editing would be mainly just the introduction
paragraph. Shape and change it so that it runs with your body, for example by
stating how subtle things in life can be beneficial to your literacy. And also, it’d be good to know why and how football made you a different person, a specific event or time
or even just the feelings that run through.
4. The essay is very
well organized contains only one idea. Only exception is the first paragraph is
a little vague in relation to the body.
5. Majority of this
will be repeating what I said up above here. The paper is certainly strong when
it comes to the body and how writing is further implemented in your career, but
the intro kind of threw me off. It made sense, but just didn’t fit with the
rest of the essay. Organization is excellent, keep it outlined like this.
Lastly, I’d just like to see a little more detail in what specifically in
football helped you change to the man you are today.
No comments:
Post a Comment